These few days I have this peculiar discontent that settles in… It’s not being ungrateful for what I have, but more like a question of ‘Isn’t there more to life than just this?’ that keeps nagging my mind.
Saw some friends’ updates and how they’re going out into the world, trying new things, meeting new people and realising dreams. It got me thinking if I’m just gonna teach as a primary school teacher my whole life and that’s it? Not saying that being teachers aint something great… It IS a noble job. In Chinese there’s a saying that goes like, teachers are the engineers of human souls. But I couldn’t help thinking if there’s a possibility that I could venture into something else besides education… like urm… a photojournalist or travel journalist? Or if $$ is the problem, perhaps a magazine journalist doing reviews on food?
And why journalism, maybe you ask… Err… because I dont know what I am good at…? Even that too, I couldnt be 100% confident that I’m good in it. Sometimes I feel that besides language and memorising and planning, I don’t know what else I can do, like seriously…
Few days back my housemates popped the question of further studies after degree, masters and PhD… if we have considered that as an option that sort of thing. I was thinking if by the grace of God we have such an opportunity, it’ll still be a dilemma for me… going further up means 8 to 5 working hours and few holidays, besides endless courses and research projects, but you’re up there, who knows you’ll have some authority to speak into the current education system… on the other hand, remaining as primary school teachers mean half-day work, LOTSA hols that you could pursue your dreams like journalism or wad, and who knows… perhaps speak into the life of the younger generation, but remain there and at that level for the rest of your life…
Sigh… in the end all these thoughts would just boil down to a conclusion: what’s important is that we walk in our calling. There’s no use if I pursue everything else but miss what God has intended for me to do…
Father, I surrender my life into Your hands. Although this vessel may be imperfect, may Your perfect will work through it and by the end of everything, may all glory be unto Your Name.
1 comment:
i wanna get married and settled down as mother, teacher n wife :P
btw, if i got the chances to further study, why not kan? hehehe :P
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